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Discussion The story of Porkchop

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Zakb009

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Recently, I decided to write a story about Minecraft, so far I have the opening. If I get good feedback, I will carry it on. If I do not, I will stop, unless I think of an idea I really like.
Although I am not totally happy with this opening, I will post it now, and change it in the future as I see fit. So, read on, and Discuss. Thanks to Fiizzle for speaking to me about it, inspiring me to write this.
Day One
Day 1 said:
Nightmares, they never stop. Never stop. Never. My mind is scarred. My once perfect life, dashed in an instant. Why me? What had I done to them? What had I done to deserve this?

It was a cold and foggy night, we could barely see past the trees. We jumped around aimlessly, in an attempt to keep warm. My mother happily sat around and watched my brother and I play along the mountains, thinking we were safe. And then it happened. My brother squealed, at first I thought he fell, but then I saw...IT. I have never been more afraid. Suddenly, there was a flurry of arrows, some flaming, some not. I watched my whole family squirm as they were hit by those deadly sticks, continuously punching them, pounding them, piercing their flesh, until they lay there. Cold. Silent. Dead. I saw my own Mother set on fire by one of those many arrows, right in front of me...I am still tormented by those images.

Since then I have wandered aimlessly through these forests, only stopping to eat and drink, trying to get as far away from that thing as possible. I would seek revenge...but what can I do? I am only a pig. My name? My name is Porkchop, I am 6 months old, and, as of today, I am an orphan.

Day One (Night)
Well...what now? No friends, no family, no point in life. At least I have one thing to be appreciative of in such a hard time. While running away from what happened, I came across a mud shelter of some kind. It was strange, never have I seen something like it. It had a burrow in it, the only way in, way too big for it to be dug by a pig, or even those woolly things I have seen. How quaint. I guess I will find out what built it sooner or later, although I hope for later. I can hear noises outside, of creatures I have learnt to avoid. Scary creatures. All they look to do is hurt us. Hurt me. I was attacked by a hairy 8 legged thing once, only saved by crawling in to a small hole, and waiting for it to lose interest. I never before realised how this place we live is such a pessimistic nightmare. Night is drawing in. I used to watch the sun set with my Brother, before we went and slept. I can hear the sky pouring down on us, and strangely, after everything that has happened, I feel my mother is looking down on me. As if she made me find this shelter. This protection. Well, I guess I should get some sleep, not much I can do now, but wait. I could need my strength, as I never know what tomorrow could hold. My first night alone...I miss you, mum.

Day Two
Sleep. What is sleep? A state of nothingness. I did not sleep last night. What I had was a terrifying experience. I dreamt I was in a fire filled place, smelling of those green exploding things. I saw white tentacle monsters flying round, hurling fire across towards me. I sprinted around frantically, whimpering, calling for help, but nobody came. Eventually, this creature lost interest. I tried looking for a way out, but there was none. I ran around aimlessly, avoiding the tentacle monsters. I stumbled across a body. It looked like my mother. A decaying dead Pig. As I stumbled across to it, it changed...for the worse. It went from my Mother's lifeless body, to a body shaped like the thing that attacked me. It held a sharp shiny object in one hand, and some of its ribs were exposed. The frightening thing was, it was shaped like the creature that killed my family, but looked like a Pig. The image still burns in my mind, refusing to leave my memory. I ran. It followed. I tried to hide, but it was if it could smell my fear. The creature cornered me. Its appearance changed rapidly, from that of my fellow kin, to that of the barbaric slaughterer of my family. It raised its shiny object. I couldn't take my eyes off its face...It held such a look of...happiness. As if killing me satisfied it. It brought its blade down, it glimmered as the fire reflected off it. I shut my eyes tight, bracing myself for the pain. But the pain never arrived. I sat there with my eyes closed, not daring to pry them open. I finally opened them, squinting from the brightness, to see why my fate was delayed. I was back in the muddy burrow. But it looked different from before. The paintings and the wooden were still there, but I could see much more I looked around, nervous from my nightmare. I whimpered to myself, scared. But I quickly pulled myself together. I knew I had to stay strong. But it all seemed so real. A painting on the wall, of a Pig, stared at me. Through my travels to here, I had not seen a single Pig. Surely I can find others? I must head off from this creepy place. I must find others, maybe they can help me, or at least adopt me.

Day Two (Night)
My luck has gotten slightly better. This morning I found a field full of Mushrooms. They tasted delicious. After I had my fill I wandered around, seeing what was out there. The emotional trauma of what happened to my family was still there, but it was not as strong. I started to notice the wonders of the world again, I was able to feel things, to taste things, to see things for what they are. I came across a stream, and washed my little pink body for the first time. The water was so refreshing. It was as if I was being washed by a thousand perfect spring mornings. I swam merrily, not caring about the hardships of my life. Then I realised. Panic! The water had washed me downstream. I was lost again. What could be worse? At least before I had a shelter. I wandered round for the rest of the day. In my travels I met a black and white creature. It looked like me, but with a bigger build. At first I was nervous to approach it, but it seemed friendly. I observed it for a while, and I gathered that it had no dwelling, and it had three children, which were around the same height as me. I decided that it was safe to approach. As I walked forward, making myself obvious as not to spook the animal, it looked up at me. It stood its ground, but as it examined me, it seemed to have a more relaxed outlook on me. Unfortunately, we failed to communicate, and as the sun started to set, I gave up. I walked away, to see what else I could find. I saw these small white creatures frolicking, but as I approached them, they skittishly ran off. I was about to find shelter...when I saw it. In the distance. That pink piece of hope. It was a fellow pig. I sprinted towards it, hoping to catch up with it. I squealed my lungs off, hoping to grab its attention. But it was hopeless, it wandered off. At least I know there are other pigs nearby. Maybe tomorrow I will find it, and see if there are more. At least I have found a small cave to sleep in.

Day Three
Warmth. Warmth wakes me up. As I open my eyes, I see pigs. I squeal out. What is going on here? I dart my eyes around my surroundings. I spot 5 pigs altogether. 2 my age, 2 older, and 1 that looks on its last legs. What happened? This is not where I went to sleep. I stand out, being careful to not wake the other pigs. What do they intend to do with me? How did they find me? I examine them as they sleep...and then I realised. That pig...from last night. It was sleeping right in front of me.
I waited for a few hours, for the pigs to awaken, and surely, one by one, they did. I approached the pig from last night, and introduced myself. "Hi, I'm Porkchop." I said. The pig stared at me. I could feel the time passing slowly, as his look made me more and more nervous. And then he spoke. "My name is Trotter. You aren't from around here are you?". He spoke softly, with a thick accent, one that I have never heard before. I stuttered "N...n...no. I am not". He looked at me, as if examining me, trying to figure out my motives. "I saw you last night, calling for me, so I went to get the others." Trotter said, "We dragged you out of that hole, and back to our home. The wilderness isn't safe for us. Let me introduce you to the others."

"This is my sister, Julie." Trotter stated. I looked up, to see what she looked like. I was bedazzled by her beauty. She had a small tuft of brown hair on top of her head, and was covered in mud. She was my kind of girl. She looked up at me, and smiled. My heart pumped rapidly. "Hi, glad to meet you." she said. I blushed, although it was hard to notice, as I was already pink. "And here are my parents" Trotter announced. I stood staring at Julie for a few seconds, before turning round to see his parents. His mother looked similar to Julie, with the same tuft of hair, whereas his dad looked unique, he was a darker pink to any pig I had ever seen. I stared at him, trying to lay my hoof on where I had seen a pig that pink before. I quickly glanced over to the oldest looking pig "And who is he?" I questioned. "Oh, that's my Granddad, he just sleeps mostly." replied Trotter. "So where is your family?".
Day Three (Noon)
"My family" I stuttered "erm, they...they're dead." All went silent. Trotter looked at me. I stared back at him, holding back tears. Then he opened his mouth "Well...you are always welcome here." He said, with an awkwardness about him. "Yeah, I would like that." I replied, with a faint smile coming across my face.

Day Three (Night)
We wandered through the fields for most of the day, looking for something to do, when the heavens opened, soaking us through to the bone. Trotter and I were too far away from home to get back before night fully set in. "So what shall we do?" I asked, curious of what he had planned. "Us? We shall shelter, there are too many bad things outside for us to be safe here." He replied, "Now help me search". We sneaked around, going from cave to cave, trying to find an appropriate hovel for us to fall asleep. We came across a nest of the green things. Trotter saw them and whispered "Creepers. Don't startle them, they blow up when scared.", so we quickly backed up, searching for more safe places. As the sky got darker and darker, the rain got heavier. We started to give up hope, when out of the sky came a beam of light. It hit a tree, which rapidly set on fire. "The sky is angry!" Yelled Trotter, diving for cover of a nearby tree. Before I had a chance to move, a beam of light hit a mere trotter away from me, I ran for cover under the nearest tree. My eyes darted round the landscape, desperately looking for Trotter. I called for him "Trotter! Trotter!", but he didn't reply. More beams of light crashed against the nearby trees, allowing me to get a better view. I saw Trotter under a nearby tree, so I darted for him when it happened. A beam came down in front of me, and hit Trotter, causing him to leap up into the air. He squealed, then went quiet. I darted over to him, praying for him to be alive. "Trotter?" I sobbed "Are you ok?". He turned his head to look at me. "I've been better." he squealed. I held him tight, when all of a sudden he started to change. His skin peeled slightly, and his feet grew longer. He pulled away from me, and stood up, like my family's killer did. His front hoofs changed, into 5 separate mini hooves. He wriggled these, and clenched them. I looked at him, and he looked back at me. "Trotter?" I asked nervously "Is that you?". He stared at me, as if looking in to my soul "Yes, it is I!" He boomed. I examined him closely, as if I had seen him like this before, and then it hit me...My nightmare! He is from My nightmare! I turned to him and said "Trotter, we have a problem...".

Day Four said:
We sheltered under a tree, until the Sun came up again, with its glistening beams. The grass sparkled in the sun, as the light shined off the rain from the night before. Sleep had not affected Trotter's appearance, he still looked like the creature from my dream. I had not spoke to him all night, with his ghastly appearance stopping me from being able to look him in the eyes. I finally summoned up the courage to speak to him, "Trotter...your appearance. I've seen it before! It was in my nightmare! You tried to kill me". Trotter stared back, in a look of confusion. "I would never try to kill you!" he yelled back, offended at my remark, "It's just a dream! Leave it at that, trust me, you're safe with me". So we wandered back in the direction of home, in the warm sun. At least things can't get worse. Can they?

Day Four (Late evening) said:
As we got closer and closer to the camp site, I got more comfortable around Trotter's new appearance. Sure, he was missing some skin, and slightly resembled my family's killer, but at least he still spoke as he had before. We talked about what had happened with my parents, and how this being attacked from a distance, not even giving us a chance to run. A tear came to my eye, thinking of my Mother. Dear sweet Mother, she was always there for me. I reminisced of better times, when my Mother took me down to the lake and washed my little pink body. She would then take me running on the grass to dry off, even though I always ended up getting muddy again, but she didn't mind. She just wanted to see me happy.

We talked for so long, that we didn't realise we were almost home. Then we noticed it. Smoke! We could not only smell it, but we could also see it! Coming from Trotter's home, on the top of a small hill. He said his family had chose this place due to its field of view, allowing them to detect any threats. Trotter squealed "What is happening? My family might be in danger!" and he sprinted off, running on only two legs! By the time I caught up with him, he was home. And he was distraught. I looked around, and saw his Mother with minor injuries to her front right leg, and his Dad seemed relatively unscathed. And then, on the floor, I saw it. On the floor, covered in blood and missing a large chunk of himself, there was Trotter's Grandad. Who would do such a thing? Killing is one thing, but then removing chunks of their body is another.

"Where's Julie?" I screamed, darting my eyes around the camp. "Where is she?" I yelled at her parents.
Her Father replied, sobbing "The beast took it, the one with the tools!". Trotter approached his parents and they screamed. "Calm down Father, it's me, Trotter!" he stated. They looked bewildered at this statement. "No...It can't be, you're...you're one of them! The monsters that took our sweet Julie!" screamed his Mother. I turned to Trotter and said "You move your Grandad out of the center of the camp, I'll speak to your parents". He looked at me, with tears in his eyes and said "Ok."
 
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1. Piglets can't talk. :tongue:
2. Porkchop?!?! WIN?!
3. Awesome story. Please write more. That was actually disturbing.
 
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Zakb009

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1. Piglets can't talk. :tongue:
2. Porkchop?!?! WIN?!
3. Awesome story. Please write more. That was actually disturbing.
<3 thanks for the feedback :biggrin: I will write some more, possibly tomorrow.
 
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Crash

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Um.... Disturbing. :blink:
 
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Nuclear Taco

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I dot have a soul anymore D: MORE :biggrin:
 
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IJustStoleABaby

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Epic. +Rep.
 
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Spooze

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For some reason, I didn't expect a pig. Im curious to see how this will turn out. Keep writing, sounds good so far.
 
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Flyy 7s

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Let's make a custom map with your story :biggrin:
 
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ImmaHoboInABox

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This is awesome you should totally wright more :biggrin:!
 
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Jon

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Seems really good! Keep on going and post it here! Good job so far.
 
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Zakb009

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Thanks for the confidence boost guys. More later hopefully :biggrin:
 
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Zakb009

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Added a second part. This is what we like to call "the atmosphere" paragraph. I try to set the scene, something that was never my strong point :tongue:
 
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Irish 7s

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Put me in... as a character... you know how f***ed up I am when it comes to this s***.
But please do go on I am enjoying it, I love it how you were doing this all the while we were on Xbox<3
 
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missile

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Second part is really great also!
 
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make me a character <3
 
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